03 March 2024

Emotional responses

 


In a past article, I mentioned that men typically make a mistake of arguing logically with women. The overwhelming majority of men never realise that when a woman argues with you, she is not actually interested in finding out the truth or convincing you that she is right. She is interested in seeing how you react. Bringing forward logical arguments is pointless, because she can endlessly invent new illogical arguments to counter them with. In order to solve the situation, you need an emotional response. Here are two real-life examples.


 

I had an almost-girlfriend who lived in another town. One morning when we began text-chatting, she had decided for some reason to pretend that it was her male cat who was chatting. That is, physically, it was obviously she who was typing in the text, but the contents of her messages were meant to sound as if it was the cat who was writing.

In a nutshell, "he" told me to lay off her because she was "his" and "he" wouldn't share her with anyone. That was nonsense, and I tried to explain "him" that we weren't competitors – my closeness with her wouldn't damage "his" interests in any way. "He" wouldn't see reason, though, and kept finding new bullshit arguments why I should keep away from her.

I was getting increasingly annoyed with this boring and pointless nonsense. I also realised I won't get anywhere with logic and reason. Clearly, she was putting me to the test. But what should I do? I remembered the rule that when a woman is bullshitting you like this, you need to find an emotional response.

So I wrote something to the effect of "It seems to me you're in a bad mood today. You'd better go chase some squirrels, you'll feel better." (She had told me previously that her cat liked chasing squirrels.)

I was mildly amazed when the "cat" immediately stopped picking on me and she turned to her normal self. Evidently, I had passed the test.

 

 

Another story. I had a girlfriend whose native language was different from mine and we usually communicated in English. One day when we were texting, she told me I should use the verb "to make love" instead of "to have sex". Now, I had never in my life referred to sex as "love-making" and I never would, because not only does it sound silly and feminine, it's also factually incorrect, implying that love is somehow a prerequisite for sex.

The nerve she has, I thought. She ought to be grateful that I'm sparing her the f-word.

But what was I to do? Our relationship wasn't yet secure enough for me to risk offending her by suggesting that sex and love are two different things. (She was religious and somewhat old-fashioned in that respect.)

On the other hand, I couldn't give in and start using that cowardly euphemism.

I decided to take a chance and try to turn the dispute into a joke. This is how I replied:

 

[My name]: Darling, would you like to make love?

[Her name]: I'm sorry, honey, I'm not in the mood tonight.

[My name]: All right, I'll just fuck you then.

 

Guess what? She found it hilarious, and her reply left no doubt that her opinion of me had greatly improved. She never complained again about the words I used to describe sex, and I, in turn, realised that nothing bad would happen to me if I would occasionally refer to sex as "love-making" when talking to a woman. (And, for that matter, I would subsequently say the f-word to her many a time at the moments when I had made her really horny, and it was never a problem.)

 

 

These are two examples of how an emotional response can work wonders with a woman when a rational dispute would only lead to a disaster.